You Smell: Treat Yourself Cheaply (Juliette Has A Gun Discovery Kit)

If you want to get yourself a cheap treat/bribe for finally vacuuming/prize for having the hottest ass in the whole fucking country/reward for knowing more about foreign affairs than all those assholes at work who never shut their damned mouths, you could do worse than the Juliette Has A Gun Discovery Kit. You'll get nine 2 ml vials of fragrance for 10 euros (about $13). All of their scents are amazing. A lot of them are made up of ingredients that I didn't think I liked (like patchouli or musk), but they manage to do something magical with them. These are not fruity, flirty, girly scents. They suit their names (Lady Vengeance, Mad Madam, etc.). I feel like a badass when I wear them. And I just like to smell different (good) things, so this was fun for me. They each come in a little envelope with a lovely notecard with its "olfactive description" eccentrically translated from the French. Sex-ay.

Unfortunately, one of my vials broke during transit (they ship from France). I could still smell it in the envelope, and it turned out to be the one I liked least anyway (Calamity J). Just be warned that that can happen. Oh, and if you decide to buy a full size bottle of one of these within two months of ordering the kit, the cost of the kit will be deducted from your purchase. The full sizes are not very cheap, though.

You Smell: Celebrity Perfume

Okay, this is kind of embarrassing. A little. Maybe? But anyway, this is my "signature scent" or whatever. The perfume I wear most of the time when I wear perfume. It's Live Luxe by Jennifer Lopez.

I mean, if I were going to be all fancy and spendthrift, I would wear this, instead. But this JLo shit actually smells really, really good. Give it a shot. It's surprising. The last time I bought it was when I randomly decided to ask the guy at the counter in JC Penney if they had any, and for some reason it was on sale for $8. It was like fate, so I bought two bottles. Usually it's $20-40.

And for what it's worth, dudes always comment on how good I smell when I wear it. I mean, not creepy stranger dudes, but the ones I want to sleep with and/or have slept with.

What's your favorite affordable scent?

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