Monday, January 16, 2017

10 Most Disappointing Products of 2016

I enjoyed auxiliary beauty's post on this theme so much that I decided to write my own. After all, complaining is one of my hobbies. When I tried to come up with a list of last year's shittiest shit, I ended up with an even 10, so that's satisfying.

Some of these things aren't bad products, exactly, but they were let-downs for me. Others are just straight up garbage. I've reviewed them all in the past (again with the complaining hobby--such a good motivator!), so I'll just give a brief comment here and link to the previous post. Here are the products that bummed me out in 2016, in no particular order:

1. Maybelline Color Tattoo in Vintage Plum

Vintage Plum may be one of the worst makeup products I've ever bought in my entire life. Patchy and unusable. It was all the more disappointing because the color was so perfect for me. Reviewed here.

2. Freeman Honeydew & Chamomile Sleeping Mask

Not only did this stuff break me out (which probably wouldn't happen for everyone who used it), it caused a burning sensation on parts of my face and had a horribly strong fake melon stench. Reviewed here.

3. Milani Color Statement Lipstick in Matte Luxe

It's not a good color for me, which obviously isn't the lipstick's fault. But the fact that it somehow just would not adhere to the surface of my lips? For that I blame Milani. Reviewed here.

4. Makeup Geek Matte Eyeshadow in Fairytale

This isn't a terrible eyeshadow, exactly, it just wasn't the color I was looking for (my fault) and the performance was mediocre at best, so for my first order from Makeup Geek, it was a let-down. Especially when compared to their excellent duochromes. Reviewed here.

5. L.A. Girl Pro Conceal HD Concealer

This concealer also wasn't awful, but I had high expectations after reading so many rave reviews claiming that it is one of the most effective and opaque concealers available at the drugstore. It was just average. Reviewed here.

6. Hard Candy Metallic Mousse Lip Color in Smoke & Mirrors

Ok, so this made my mouth look like a robot's butthole. That's the nature of metallic liquid lipsticks. The bigger problem was that the color of the product in the tube was completely different from the color on my lips. Reviewed here.

7. Wet N Wild (Reformulated) ColorIcon Blush in Pearlescent Pink

It's a fine blush. But I was really disappointed to find that it's a totally different color from the original Pearlescent Pink, which is a favorite of mine. In fact, it's not even very pink at all. Reviewed here.

8. Stila Stay All Day Waterproof Liquid Liner

Another product that just didn't live up to the hype for me, considering so many people consider it a holy grail liner. Not only did it not "stay all day," the tip became completely frayed and unusable while there was still a lot of product left. Reviewed here.

9. e.l.f. 3-in-1 Mascara

This one is a little different, because I had used and loved this product before. But I bought the mascara above last spring, and it was so dried up that the brush got stuck in the tube the first time I opened it. When I tried to exchange it, I found four more tubes that were the same. The fifth brush actually came out, but when I got it home, it was still so dry that I was only able to use it a handful of times. I don't know if my CVS just had particularly old stock (but the e.l.f. display hadn't been around long) or what, but I'm not going to take my chances with this stuff again. Too bad, because it's not easy to find a tubing mascara for less than $5!

10. Kat Von D Studded Kiss Lipstick in Poe

Does it count as a disappointment if I knew the stuff was going to be bad, but I bought it anyway? I don't regret buying this lipstick, but it sure is a pain in the ass to apply. Reviewed here.

I'm not sure there are any real lessons to be learned here. Sure, several of these were impulse purchases, but several had been carefully researched, and some I had even owned (in one form or another) before! Some were very cheap, but others were not cheap at all. Shrug?

What were your biggest duds last year?


  1. I lost it at "Ok, so this made my mouth look like a robot's butthole." I'm going to think of that every time I put on my new Milani metallic matte liquid lipstick. I'm fine with my mouth looking like a robot's butthole, for the record, but I think it's a shame that those lipsticks are often modeled by beauty gurus who have perfectly smooth, pillowy lips because of injections.

    I also do that thing of buying a product that I'm pretty sure will suck. Why??

    1. I think the silvery color of Smoke & Mirrors made it more robotic. I'm more content with the robot part than the butthole part, though. I think my lips look totally normal most of the time but, yeah, in close ups most lips that aren't unnaturally swollen are wrinkly.

      As for your question, because it was on sale? (That's my reason in this case, I think.) :(

  2. Living Proof No Frizz Humidity Shield. It claims it "is a weightless solution for dry hair application that blocks humidity even when it reaches 100% and prevents and correct the first signs of frizz. Bullshit. I live in south Texas and had such high hopes for this. ����

    Also Bumble & Bumble prêt-à-powder. "Equal parts dry shampoo, style extender and volume in a pinch." No, no and no.

    I'll stick with my Brocato Maximum Hold hairspray and my Design.ME Puff Me powder volumizer.

    1. Ah, I didn't even think about hair products, because I'm so inept at doing my hair that I rarely know how to judge anything more complicated than a shampoo or conditioner.

  3. That Colour Tattoo is SO BAD. I tried to make it work for a long time because I loved the colour, but eventually I just cut my losses. There are other taupe-y purples out there! Luckily 2016 was not full of many makeup fails for me.

    1. I'm glad you had a good makeup year! I've now discovered Laura Mercier Plum Smoke, which is a perfect and beautiful alternative to that Maybelline crap.

  4. I'm with you on Smoke & Mirrors. It looks purple in the tube! And then it's a weird sparkly grey, and the application is TERRIBLE. I'll probably get rid of mine soon, I never wear it.


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