Thursday, April 9, 2015

The Beauty Scenario Tag

I was tagged on this one by Beauty Reductionista what seems like a million years ago in Internet time, but I guess was only about 3 weeks ago in reality. So maybe I am not as slow as I feel. These questions seem to be designed to make me think about how much I really value all this crap I have. Let's find out!

You have to get rid of all of your foundations and only keep one high-end and one drugstore; which do you keep?

All I can think here is yes, please! Give me an excuse to get rid of all my foundations and start over, since the only ones I have left are ones I don't like much. Then I wouldn't feel obligated to use up this crap. None of them is high end. I'd probably replace them with tinted moisturizers instead, since I don't have a lot of skin tone issues that need heavy coverage. I've been looking at options from The Balm, Laura Mercier, and Paula's Choice. None of them is very cheap, but that's a product that seems harder to find at the drugstore.

Here's what I had at the end of last year, but at this point I'm left with just the Maybelline stick, the Revlon, and the Sephora tinted moisturizer.

You go for an interview, and the lady interviewing you has lipstick on her teeth. Do you approach the subject or ignore it completely?

I would absolutely ignore it. I would be surprised to find someone in my field wearing noticeable lipstick in an interview, to be honest. And I really need a job, so it seems the safer bet to say nothing. I can't afford to be noble at the moment. Better that she wonders whether or not I noticed than that I risk offending her. In another situation I might mention it, but not in an interview for an academic job when the odds are already stacked against me - academics are prickly weirdos under the best of circumstances.

You're not feeling yourself and need a pick-me-up lipstick. Which do you go for?

Am I buying something or just putting on something I own? If it's the latter, I regularly put on garish/fun lipstick at home that I can't wear to work, like red or orange or hot pink or dark wine.

You go back in time for a day to your teenage years; how would you do your hair or makeup differently?

I had a horrible boyfriend in high school who constantly tried to convince me not to wear any makeup or feminine clothes, etc. If I could go back in time to my teenage years, I would chop his dick off.

You ask your hairdresser for a shoulder length Pixie Lott haircut but they hear wrong and give you a pixie cut - what would you do?

A) Smile, say thank you, call your mum and cry hysterically
B) Cry in the chair and things get awkward
C) Complain to the manager and demand a refund

As other people have mentioned, how do I not notice all my hair being chopped off before it's finished? I mean, I have terrible eyesight and I have to take off my glasses in the chair, but even then I would be able to tell the difference between shoulder length and pixie. I'm going to be a brat and not choose one of the options. If she started to chop off too much, I would probably hesitate uncertainly about what was going on until it was too late to stop her, then stop her and ask for a refund. So I guess it's a combination of A and C.

Your friend surprises you with a 4-day city break and you have one hour to pack. Which 'Do it all' palette do you pack in your makeup bag?

The only one of those (with eyes, lips, and blush) I have is a shimmery Pixi palette, but I probably wouldn't take it, because it's bulky (and the packaging is embarrassingly juvenile - better it remains in my bedroom). I guess since I recently got this Bare Minerals set called "The Magic Act" on sale (below) and I haven't quite decided what I think of it, I could play with it on the trip. I'd have to pack lip stuff separately along with a bunch of other crap. I'd really prefer to travel with smaller options than a bulky or fragile palette.

Does it annoy anyone else that the eyeshadow pans are crooked?
Your house has been robbed. Don't worry, everyone is safe, but your beauty stash has been raided. What's the product you really hope is safe?

I thought a lot about this, and I don't think there's any one thing I would particularly care about losing. But I would be really fucking pissed about everything being gone, because I can't afford to replace it - or maybe my renter's insurance would cover it. Would they really believe that I own this much makeup? Maybe I should start taking inventory photos.

It's interesting that I am not particularly attached to any of the beauty crap I own. Does that mean it's more about the experience than the object for me, or something? Anyone want to analyze me? I think I've had enough introspection for one day.

I'll tag Beauty in a JarHello Pretty Bird, and anyone else who wants to play!


  1. Thanks for obliging me! Cutting off of the high school dick made me LOL for real. And tilty misaligned makeup makes me almost as angry as someone making off with the entirety of my makeup stash. We don't actually *need* this stuff - we bought them because they're supposed to be pretty, goddammit.

    1. It was fun! Yes, I can imagine especially if I had bought that palette when it came out as an Xmas present for my self or someone else, I would be pretty irritated. I think it's overall not well made. It kind of folds up wonky too.

  2. LOL at the high school thing. Cutting off a bad influence (literally or figuratively) is probably the best makeover!

  3. Took me a while, but I finally go to it :-)


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